Bad News: The National Weather Service says there is a real good chance that the winter of 2009-2010 will be wetter and colder in our region which takes in parts of West Virginia, Virginia, Maryland and of course the District of Columbia. They are talking about cold air sweeping in from the north and west colliding with moisture coming up the coast from the south. A recipe for ice or snow storms.

Good News: The folks who make THE CALL, that is, the decision whether to close government, delay arrivals, send folks home early, come to work late or whatever, have decided they will make THE CALL so that it will be ready for broadcasting (can you say WFED 1500 AM or WTOP 103.5 FM) by 4 a.m at the latest.

(Officials who make weather-related calls in other parts of the country should take note of the 4 a.m. deadline for their folks.)

In other words, most of the area's 350,000 (that we know of) federal workers will know the situation before they have to get out on the roads or rails.

Office of Personnel Management Director John Berry knows the agony-and-the-ecstasy decision over snow days. Past dithering or mis-calls have caused many previous directors to slip, slide or fall on their faces. Because he grew up here, he also knows the angst (and often times danger) a snow or ice storm can cause here.

Washington, at its worst, can resemble Napoleon's winter siege of Moscow.

So he's pledged to make THE CALL, the key decision, by 4 a.m. at the latest. That is a great leap forward.

In the past OPM directors have told people to stay home (and been ridiculed when the snow storm fizzled). They have also told people to come to work (and been vilified by folks who say they put all of us in danger). One even had the bad luck of being out of town, as in Iowa (campaigning for a presidential candidate). That geographic and time difference caused a flap here and haunted the director for the rest of her term.

Washington is an area full of people from Chicago, Minneapolis-St. Paul, Fargo, Buffalo, Boston and other climes. These stalwarts laugh at snow, sneer at blizzards and never utter a discouraging word even during sleet storms. If you doubt it, ask them. (Just don't watch the national TV news when it covers a snowstorm in those areas).

The problem with these winter warriors is that once they move here many suddenly lose their driving skills in this very hilly (its a river town people!!!) and geographically huge region.

So what happens is...

When the winter warriors get here, after taking just one drink of Potomac River water, all of the driving skills of their youth back home in God's country disappear. They go native. And a lot of the time go off the road - something that never happens in Illinois, Alaska or Montana. So we are assured.

Ice Queens from Pittsburgh routinely collide with Mountain Men from New Hampshire while navigating DC's traffic circles. Those circles, added to a shortage of Potomac River bridges and decades of non-visionary highway planning in Northern Virginia, give us the dubious honor of having the 2nd worst traffic in the country.

Much of our winter problem stems from the fact that winters here are generally mild. Local governments (and there are many, many of them) don't have enough snow removal equipment. Or the skills that they have in Syracuse or Butte. Or as many government workers.

Part of it too is the Washington region itself. It has mountains to the west, a huge bay (the Chesapeake) and good-sized ocean (the Atlantic) to the east. And lots of rivers (hence hills that people don't notice while driving) which make bad weather driving even worse. Walkers, runners and cyclists recognize hills that drivers don't feel.

What difference does that make? Check out these charts which show the high and low points of the Marine Corps Marathon (which goes through the generally flat parts of DC and Virginia) against the same 26.2 mile course for the Chicago Marathon where the Tenleytown section of DC would qualify as Mount Rushmore.

And for OPM Director John Berry, win lose or draw this winter, thanks in advance for the early warning. We're gonna need it!

People here (even if they came from there) just don't know how to handle a little snow!!!

Nearly Useless Factoid
by Suzanne Kubota

An Aldabra tortoise estimated to be between 75 and a 100 years old living at Cleveland Metroparks Zoo was recently discovered to be male. "Mary" has been living at the zoo since 1955.

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