Mike Causey

This Column Stinks, Big Time!

Did you hear about the government-generated hoax that worried a lot of Thrift Savings Plan investors? Senior Correspondent Mike Causey says the so-called securi...

Federal News Network Staff

February 2, 2009 4:00 am

3 min read

If you’ve got a good sized olfactory gland in good working order you may want to BACK OFF FROM THIS COLUMN RIGHT NOW!!!

You have been warned.

But if you are foolish enough to continue, be advised that…

Years ago, a radio station (I think in England) told listeners that it had developed a technique whereby it could transmit smells – foul odours – over the airwaves. It warned persons with sensitive honkers to either change stations, or turn their radios off.

Naturally thousands of people listened, and sniffed. Admit it, what would you do? Heck, I’d have turned it up and stood by with a candle!

Most, of course, got nothing. No skunk-like odors invaded their living rooms or kitchens.

But…

But dozens of listeners, maybe hundreds, claimed the stench from their radios knocked them across the room, or caused their dogs to howl or their goldfish to go belly-up. It was horrible. Some sued. Others suggested that prison, or the gallows, was too good for the stinky broadcasters.

Of course it was a hoax! I mean a lot of radio stinks, but it’s the sound, the stuff they are saying or playing, that smells. No radio station has yet succeeded in actually transmitting smells even though a scientific team at WFED (housed as you might have guessed, in the Skunkworks) is working round-the-clock, except after 5 p.m. and weekends and holidays, on the challenge.

TSP Hoax

Now for a closer-to-home and real hoax. That is, the hoax that just went down, and it’s one that scared a lot of feds.

Early in the week we got a variety of tips (thank you, thank you) from feds who had heard that somebody had hacked into the Thrift Savings Plan, or something like that. This hacker/hoaxer was contacting TSP investors at their worksite computers. They were asked to supply personal data after going to a website. They were told the deadline for complying was January 31.

Some people smelled a rat. Others figured it must be legit. Who else but the so-called “TSP Account Coordinator” would have their names and e-mail addresses.

Except it was a fake. A hoax. Actually a “security” exercise the Justice Department tried on its people to see how savvy or gullible they were. Officials in other agencies believe it came from someone in the Bureau of Prisons.

Memo To Whoever Did It: Bad idea. Why don’t you send around an e-mail telling people the building is on fire, and to leap out the windows. Or that tainted apple butter has been detected in the city. Or to call home because your dog/cat has died.

Even the folks who run the TSP were temporarily taken in by the hoax. They put up a warning on their webpage for awhile. Many, many feds heard about it and were worried about their accounts. Naturally they blamed the TSP for letting its system, which was not compromised, get compromised.

For more on the hoax, and how it spread, click here.

Nearly Useless Factoid

Sure, you’ve heard of the Forbes 500… the list of the 500 richest people. But the financial magazine has another list! “The Forbes Fictional 15“, the listing of fiction’s richest. Number One? Your employer: Uncle Sam.

To reach me: mcausey@federalnewsradio.com