Is there life after government?

While I’m taking a time out, I’ve asked several long-time readers to do a guest column.  Today’s is from Tom Kell an old (but not that old) friend, former Marine and long-time D.C.-based fed,   Here’s Tom:

Did you know that Coca-Cola glasses take up less space on the shelf if you alternate them, one up, one down?

This is important information to me now that my wife, Penny, also, has retired.

When she did that, we retreated from Southern California where the temperatures were low, but the rents were high.

We weren’t renting. We actually “owned” our home, along with the bank. But, metaphorically, OK

The metaphor (rents = general living expenses) shows that it was expensive and crowded there. We loved it, but, you know, adjustments have to be made when employment status changes.

Beltway and other feds know this only too well. (Non-English-majors can look up metaphor and simile on Google). I’m pretty sure. It’s like a sure thing (simile). And I’ve got a horse right here. (Metaphor: “Guys and Dolls” 1950s). Metaphor of what, I’m not entirely sure. But I just saw the musical performed extraordinarily well by the Williamsburg Players. It was on Broadway in the ‘50s. But I think it’s actually talking about the 2016 presidential race!

My wife, Penny, is a big Coke fan. A relative bought her a couple shares of Coke stock when she was a kid. Over the years, they’ve increased in value — but the value of Coke stuff has, I think, increased way out of proportion to the value of Coke stock, in Penny’s head.

Coca-Cola has been mastering marketing with Coke stuff from the late 1800s. Glasses, trays, calendars, etc.

If you come to visit us, you may have to sleep in the “Coke Room.” It’s an extra bedroom festooned with all manner of Coca-Cola logos and memorabilia.

After I retired (end of 1995. A century ago!) from my full-time job as a public information specialist with the U.S. Office of Personnel Management (nee U.S. Civil Service Commission), I “freelanced” for a few years in the Washington, D.C. area. I’m basically a writer/editor. So that meant doing newsletters, resumes, etc. For associations. For friends. For free.

Well, not entirely. But the wife determined there was way too much “free” in my freelance activity and was happy to see me go when FEMA accepted my resume and hired me as a Disaster Assistance Employee (DAE).

That was a good thing. FEMA became a steady, if intermittent, gig.  — Tom Kell

Nearly Useless Factoid

By Michael O’Connell

The $35.1 billion in revenue Coca-Cola rakes in annually makes the company the 84th largest economy in the world, edging out Costa Rica.

Source: Business Insider

Copyright © 2024 Federal News Network. All rights reserved. This website is not intended for users located within the European Economic Area.